Are you aware of the fact that social scientists can predict if a couple is heading for a disastrous relationship? Well not with hundred percent certainty but they can predict with almost ninety percent accuracy.
The key
In all relationships, there is some conflict. The conflict may be in the form of verbal arguments or disagreements. You may beg to differ in various aspects, and that is not at all an unpleasant thing. In fact, every individual is entitled to her opinion. If you want to have a healthy relationship, then the secret is effective communication.
Healthy partnership
You are in a position to understand your partner in a much better way when you start communicating with each other. Effective communication paves the way for a stronger relationship. There is no way you can escape conflicts in any marital relationship. Even a couple who is apparently happy, they also tend to argue.
Solution-oriented approach
Stories of so-called perfect couples splitting up are not at all a rare occurrence. However, there is something that distinguishes happy couples from the rest of the flock. Conflicts among a couple may reach a point when divorce becomes inevitable. Since there is a lot of pain associated with a divorce, it is only but natural that couples would want to avoid this from happening.
Accurate prediction
It was Dr. John Gottman who discovered that he could predict which couples would end up in divorces with more than ninety percent accuracy. In the year 1992, he conducted several studies in this aspect. He continued with his research work to determine the key factors which played an essential role in making a couple of end in divorce.
Get a grasp on the factors
Among the various indicators, harsh setup is one such factor. The moment a conversation regarding conflict starts with traces of sarcasm is an indicator that the conversation will not have a happy ending. You can predict the outcome of marriage ninety six percent of the time, judging by the way the conversation is headed.
Negative elements
Dr. Gottman identified four kinds of harmful components in a relationship. His studies were based on three kinds of the couple – those that had to terminate their marital relationship, those that were happy and those that were unhappy but remained together. He referred to criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling as the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. It is the presence of these negative aspects that spells disaster for any relationship.
Conflict resolution
Couples who reflect on their memories with fondness have happy marriages. Frequent flooding occurs due to harsh setups that pave the way for the Four Horsemen. Each of these factors is known for its destructive nature. If they happen to take place in the same conflict, then the extent of destruction becomes all the more pronounced.
Get professional support
It is not possible to come across couples with perfect history. However, couples can always derive strength from their struggling period and turn them in a positive mode. Get in touch with a professional therapist to tackle issues in a timely fashion.
